I Am In Church Again

I am in church again,
The same church that I attend,
Having the same pastor and ministers
I am not a stranger,
But find myself introducing myself again to people I know
Give me your number,

I find myself asking,
What was your name again?
In a congregation of believers
Yes I am a believer,
A faithful servant

But I never connected with them,
A white sheep in a flock that
I did not know how to follow,
I can’t say I am a black sheep in a white flock,
Because black means impure,
But I was white with maybe a
Little brown and green stains to say
I wasn’t perfect white,

I am a lamb of a merciful shepherd
Who would not slaughter me
But wash me with his own blood,
The giver of identity even when lost in dirt,
Am back in church again after seven months,
Months of Covid and online churches,
And another January to test the waters of faith,

The young are out there,
Exposed to real life before they even began theirs,
High school students testing the hustles and getting paid,
The primary students saw no journey in academics
That was kept at a halt by a pandemic
Putting the whole world at unrest,

A world that if you become a doctor
They need your highest grades and recommendations,
What do you think you have to tell these kids to study and make it in life?
They saw their dreams depend on people who didn’t believe in them,

Am back in church again,
And to be surprised everyone thought of how life came to an end,
I remember thinking,
Why die when I have left no family to live my dream?
The sweetness of coming home and
My little squad running to me to say welcome back,

I saw dreams being snatched,
Families being torn apart…
I failed to believe in the Father above,
And still expected to believe in myself,
Am sorry we were scared,
At first we thought about our desires,
Our dreams,
If that was your will
I am sure no one was ready to manifest to it,
Prophets were to be chosen and we would have been left,
Am in church again,
To restore my faith in you
I was lost

# Love for art
Fred Santana Sino (Fred the poet)

Fred Santana Sino aka Fred the poet, is a young Kenyan writer and poetry performer who has a mind-blowing way of expressing real life situations in a unique set up in his writing. Apart from poetry writing and performance, he also does pencil drawing and paintings.  Find him on Facebook @Sino Santana and Instagram @fred_the_poet. To read more of his writings heck out his blog @fredpoet.art.blog or check out his Youtube channel @Fred the poet.